episode 28… we byke!
in this episode, we are exploring the topic of quick fixes — are there any available for heart work?!
take a listen below!
show notes for the podcast episode
below are the show notes (supplemental reading) for this episode!
use them to take notes, complete the exercises, and take action this week —
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dear dope chick,
welcome + welcome back!
are you ready to take action today?
what you’ll need:
for those who are new here, who haven’t been here in quite a while, or have been rockin’ with me since day one —
dear dope chick™ is an action based podcast so that means that every single episode you are challenged to take one small step that aligns with living life on your own terms.
that means you’re taking one step today that aligns with the lifestyle that you most desire.
find out what you like.
now, as always, you have a choice.
do you have to take a step today? well, I do encourage you to take one.
hopefully, this podcast will touch in a way that you’re inspired to do just that — take a step.
even if that means you don’t agree with the action packed suggestions I’ve made in this episode, at least it can get you to think about what it is you do want to do + get started on that today instead.
what it means to live life on your own terms
living life on your own terms means to take intentional steps, to acknowledge that the decisions you are making are you own.
you are making these steps because you know (or feel) this is what’s best for you right now.
you owe it to yourself to steer your life in the direction that you’ve always wanted to go + you can do that for yourself today.
let’s get to work!
so, grab a notebook or journal that is dedicated to this podcast so that you can participate in the activities and exercises discussed; to see how much you have grown over the course of your life.
have you heard our previous episodes?
not yet ready do the activities presented in this episode?
we have others that may interest you so if you aren’t familiar or haven’t heard our previous episodes, take a listen so that you can make an informed choice today.
you can listen to them here.
to do this week:
home improvement, time!
today’s action is to do the work.
don’t worry about a quick fix — there isn’t one for the work you’re embarking upon.
this type of work requires you to go through the process in order to get the value that you’re seeking.
capitalism will sell you on the idea that there’s a work around for heart work —
you’ll see + read a million memes that have “how to” whatever it is you’re looking to do on it
you’ll read all these “how to” manuals
you’ll attend workshops + seminars about “how to” with the expectation that what you learned is going to teach itself to you —
+ i’m here to tell you otherwise.
tools in the arsenal
can memes, manuals, + workshops be used as tools? absolutely.
are they a substitute for the work that needs to be done? no.
what you read on those memes, what you read in those manuals, what you heard in those workshops — none of that information is going to self execute alone.
they require you to actually do some work. first off, is it true what you’ve learned? dig deeper.
is any of what you’ve read or learned through these memes, manuals, + workshops remotely true?
do you know that for a fact (is it factual)?
dig deeper, deep dive into the information presented to you.
don’t be afraid to question what you’ve learned: question everything. you don’t have to take anything as face value.
the work requires you to go through the process.
because the process is
- where you learn,
- where you grow,
- where you fail,
- where you get back up again,
- where you reinvent,
- where you tweak,
- where you succeed.
it’s where you really get a grasp on the “how to” of it all.
shared experience vs. lived experience
I may can share with you my experience with someone, but it’s nothing like expecting it on your own.
also, in learning how to do something, even if it is one of these list, courses, or books, you still have to go through the process.
so taking into account:
yes, I can read this
yes, I can hear this person speak
yes, I can take this list + put it on my vision board + read it every single day
but in order to do the work of learning + unlearning, I still need to go through the process.
over the course of the week, slow down!
slow down. i just wanna get to know you.
slowing down helps you see what needs to be done, to process it, + to get it done.
you can’t be on the go all the time because then the work that you need to get done gets overlooked.
you’re multitasking.
your focus is elsewhere.
your energy reserves are low.
you’re tired.
you’re complaining.
you say things like, II’m tired, I don’t have the patience for this. I don’t feel like doing this.”
slow down.
you can’t do work when youre consciously or subconsciously avoiding it.
slow your ass down to receive the download on what to do.
you are in constant communication with your environment whether you know it or not.
it’s giving you all sorts of feedback; it’s telling you everything you need to know about yourself:
- how you perceive the world
- how you move through the world
- what you believe about yourself
- what you believe about others (which is essentially what you believe about yourself)
so with the world constantly giving you feedback, I have a few questions:
are you listening?
are you receiving what it is asking of you to do?
how much can you hear when you’re talking over someone?
how much time can you commit to learning when youre always busy?
when you slow down you’re more receptive to this type of information.
additionally, keep reciting those affirmations!
for 21 days straight we are reciting previously written affirmations.
continue reciting your affirmations this week.
check out the previous episode if you have not to get a jumpstart on this action step.
affirmation cards are here!
dear dope chick™ has affirmation + encouragement cards readily available on deardopechick.com. head on over + purchase a deck to have those cards on deck while you journey!
cop a deck of encouragement + affirmation cards
these pocket sized affirmation cards are perfect for every day + on-the-go encouragement! shop our decks here.
my final thoughts:
there is work to be done.
are you willing to get your hands dirty?
are you willing to explore the depths of yourself, the parts of yourself that you’ve conveniently + unknowingly have hidden away + neglected all these years?
are you ready to do a deep dive + uncover what you are truly made of?
are you willing to put yourself out there?
are you willing to commit to showing up for yourself every single day regardless of how you feel?
are you willing to put in the work?
are you?
do you believe in yourself?
the belief that you can get it done has to be there first before anything else goes down.
if you don’t believe that you can do it, why put your neck out there?
by taking this defeated attitude of “aw man, it’s probably not going to work out anyway”, you’ve already set yourself up for disappointment.
it means you aren’t willing to give it your all or your best.
it’s as if your mind is tainted by disappointment + expectations.
lose the expectations.
lose any performance expectations + just do it (shoutout to nike).
do the damn work.
there’s a 50/50 chance this will work out for you
“well, what if is doesn’t?”
well, what if it does?
give yourself a fighting chance.
go out there, explore, do the work + be willing to get your hands dirty for a change.
don’t look for a quick fix.
for this particular work, it’s not there.
take it day by day, step by step, + moment by moment.
understand that nothing of value will come your way or stick around unless you’re able to put in the work to keep it.
the feeling of accomplishment, conquering each step that comes your way, is motivation enough to keep going.
you may not see your desired outcome because the outcome isn’t the answer.
the answer lies in the process + once you figure out the process, then you can figure out how to make things work out for you.
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i appreciate you taking the time to read + listen!
i wanna thank you for showing up today.
thank you for being here.
thank you for lending your ear.
thank you for lending your heart.
most importantly, i want to thank you for being you.
i’ll see you on the next episode. 👋🏾
be you, be dope!
Phylicia Sadsarin
Mindset Coach
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