episode 42: we in here!
in this episode, we are turning definitive statements about ourselves into thought provoking questions that lead to meaningful + intentional action!
take a listen below!
show notes for the podcast episode
below are the show notes (supplemental reading) for this episode!
use them to take notes, complete the exercises, and take action this week —
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dear dope chick,
welcome + welcome back!
i’m so glad you’ve tuned in today.
are you ready to take action?
what you’ll need:
for those who are new here, who haven’t been here in quite a while, or have been rockin’ with me since day one —
dear dope chick™ is an action based podcast so that means that every single episode you are challenged to take one small step that aligns with living life on your own terms.
that means you’re taking one step today — big, small, however you wanna categorize or label it, that aligns with the lifestyle that you most desire.
it’s up to you.
none of this is up to me, your mama’nem, friends, family, loved ones, concerned ones — it doesn’t matter.
this is about you.
what you do you want to do today?
what does an action step look like for you today?
regardless of whether you acknowledge it or not, you are taking steps; every single moment of your life you are choosing.
whether it’s your choice or you’re influenced by someone else’s choice + want to pawn it off to them, it is still your choice.
it’s time to own that.
it’s time to say, “yes, I did that” + stand ten toes down in that + say, “that’s all me”.
accountability.
what you decide to do is up to you.
however, you owe it to yourself to steer your life in the direction that you’ve always wanted to go + you can do that for yourself today.
let’s get to work!
so, grab a notebook or journal that is dedicated to this podcast so that you can participate in the activities and exercises discussed; to see how much you have grown over the course of your life.
have you heard our previous episodes?
not yet ready do the activities presented in this episode?
we have others that may interest you so if you aren’t familiar or haven’t heard our previous episodes, take a listen so that you can make an informed choice today.
you can listen to them here.
to do this week:
a life full of questions.
today’s action is to turn your definitive statements into questions.
definitives statements are thoughts we vocalize that are assumed factual based on the nature of how it’s spoken.
these statements use the verb “am” —
- i am
- you are
- they are
- we are
- she is
- he is
- this is
often times we are unaware of what we are saying about ourselves or claiming ourselves to be.
for example we’ll trip on something and say “i’m such a klutz!”
instead of supporting the klutz narrative + making that a storyline in our lives, we have the opportunity to ask a question or a series of questions to investigate, to get to the bottom of how we are truly feeling about and seeing ourselves:
well, would you really define yourself as a klutz?
did you trip on something + fall over this once or are you constantly + consistently tripping over any + everything?
whether tripping over something occasionally or tripping over something continuously, lead with this:
i noticed i tripped + it’s happening more often than i would like. how can i improve my coordination?
this is an acknowledgement rather than a judgement.
actions constantly change.
you wanna start doing something different, you challenge yourself to do it by presenting yourself with an opportunity.
judging every single thing that you do + labeling it as good or bad is mental torture.
acknowledge what you’re doing without beating yourself up about it or labeling yourself due to an infraction.
you are much more than what you do.
unless you pride yourself in being one, you aren’t a klutz.
you tripped + you are working on your coordination.
over the course of the week, notice the labels you or others have assigned to you + question them.
ex. 1: you say you’re an expert in financial literacy.
expert is finite + subconsciously caps your willingness to learn more.
instead, let’s shift the narrative:
what more can I learn about financial literacy?
instead of being an expert + capping your potential, this statement acknowledges that you are continuously a student.
society may categorize you as that because of how well versed you are in the subject.
as a student, know that you can learn more + that the possibilities to uncover newness is endless.
ex. 2 you’ve been told since birth that you’re fat.
fat isn’t inherently good or bad, it is.
it is incredibly subjective, so if you want to call yourself fat that is completely + utterly up to you.
however, if you are doing it because you’re insulting yourself + are doing it because someone insulted you using those words, consider the intention + motive behind the words.
so instead of labeling ourselves as fat because of someone else’s standards + if you’re tired of referring to yourself this way, ask instead:
- are my current actions supporting a strength building lifestyle?
- in what ways can i improve my endurance?
- in what ways can i incorporate more nutrient rich meals into my day?
- in what was can i include more movement into my day?
what is it that you’re truly looking for?
that’s the question you ask yourself of how you can bring more of that into your day, into your life.
losing weight is a byproduct of doing the work.
find what it is that you want to do.
the work comes first.
the action comes before you see the change.
+ before all of that, the mindset has to shift.
we have to wholeheartedly believe in what we’re saying to support the intention behind the action.
it serves no real purpose to do something we don’t believe in for the sake of saying we did it.
we haven’t convinced ourselves it’s what we want + when we are unsure of what we want, we are easily swayed to do something else.
resolve right now what your core attributes are what you speak over your life.
instead of saying things we don’t mean about ourselves, yet are so programmed to say, we’re intentional with our words.
we say what we mean about ourselves:
- i am love personified.
- i am patient with myself + others.
- i am open to different perspectives + possibilities.
- i am capable of doing dope things.
- i am constantly learning + growing.
- i am free to change my mind at anytime.
resolve what you truly hope to see.
hope isn’t some obscure thing that will never happen.
hope resides within your belief.
we believe so strongly + with such persistence, that we know we will see what we hope for because we trust + have faith in our actions that we are on that path + we can choose different at anytime.
when you who you are, should you lose focus you can quickly shift back into alignment.
additionally, keep reciting those affirmations!
for 21 days straight we are reciting previously written affirmations.
continue reciting your affirmations this week.
check out the previous episode if you have not to get a jumpstart on this action step.
affirmation cards are here!
dear dope chick™ has affirmation + encouragement cards readily available on deardopechick.com. head on over + purchase a deck to have those cards on deck while you journey!
cop a deck of encouragement + affirmation cards
these pocket sized affirmation cards are perfect for every day + on-the-go encouragement! shop our decks here.
my final thoughts:
watch your mouth, now.
watch what you’re saying about the people you love.
if you cannot identify a loving bone in your body that you have toward yourself, start there.
what do you love about yourself?
list everything + don’t stop until you cant go no more.
you see that list? do you see how beautiful of a being you are?
not even because of what you wrote, you’re a beautiful being because you see the beauty in yourself!
love exists, you know it’s there, you love it, acknowledge it, + you’re brave enough to proclaim it.
when we don’t feel we have love in us, this exercise is proof of otherwise.
start with the love you have + compound it, make it grow by seeing the beauty in others.
by seeing folks for who they truly are + not by their actions only.
we are all growing, learning, + putting our best efforts forward even when our best seemingly doesn’t stack up to another’s best.
there’s no need for comparison.
you are who you are + that’s what makes you you.
so don’t even go out there thinking that you have to look at someone else’s accomplishments, achievements, or how in touch with themselves they are — that is them.
who are you?
you are you!
be you.
let’s check our expectations of ourselves + one another,
let’s rethink the labels we put on ourselves + others,
+ let’s become way more intentional about what we say about ourselves + others.
question everything.
that way, you can remain aligned to who you are at your core + be who you are in the most unapologetic way.
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i appreciate you taking the time to read + listen!
thank you for being here today.
thank you for showing up, for taking action + for listening.
thank you for applying the information you learned here.
+ most importantly, i thank you for being you.
i’ll see you on the next episode. 👋🏾
be you, be dope!
Phylicia Sadsarin
Mindset Coach
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