thanks for tuning into episode 14!
in this episode, we are ditching the should have, could have, + would have’s + getting into our lives right here, right now!
take a listen below!
show notes for the podcast episode
below are the show notes (supplemental reading) for this episode!
use them to take notes, complete the exercises, and take action this week —
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dear dope chick,
welcome + welcome back!
thank you for being here today, thank you for showing up!
i really appreciate it!
are you ready to take action today? are you up for the challenge?
what you’ll need:
for those who are new here o haven’t been here in quite a while —
dear dope chick™ is an action based podcast so that means that every episode you are challenged, encouraged, + inspired to take one step that aligns with living life on your own terms.
that means you are taking one small step today that aligns with the lifestyle that you most desire.
do i have to take action, P?
whether you choose to take action today is your prerogative — you can do what you wanna do (Bobby said it best 😝).
is it beneficial to take some action today? yes! it’s always beneficial to take some action for yourself.
i encourage you to take some type of action today!
you owe it to yourself to steer your life in the direction that you’ve always wanted to go + you can do that today.
let’s get to work!
so, grab a notebook or journal that is dedicated to this podcast so that you can participate in the activities and exercises discussed; to see how much you have grown over the course of your life.
have you heard our previous episodes?
not yet ready do the activities presented in this episode?
we have others that may interest you so if you aren’t familiar or haven’t heard our previous episodes, take a listen so that you can make an informed choice today.
you can listen to them here.
do you think you could?
do you ever look at your life + think about what could have been for you?
you look at all of the decisions you’ve made over the course of your life + you think “damn, I really could have been xyz…“
I really could have been married with a kid by now
I really could have been living in another state or another country right now
I really could have been working my dream job right now
would you have, though?
then, you may find yourself thinking about what would have happened in your life:
if I hadn’t torn my ACL, man, I’d be in the pros right now!
if I would have started before today, I’d be further along…
idk… should we?
don’t get me started on where we think we should be:
I should not be in my 30’s (or insert your age) living life like this!
I should definitely be on vacation right now
a whole bunch of coulda, shoulda, woulda!
honestly, all coulda, wouldas, shouldas do is keep us away from participating in the present.
they take us back to a place in the past, or a place in the further, but fail to place in the present where all the action is happening.
your past is gone
there is nothing happening in your past.
what has happened is done + there is nothing else that can happen there.
any actions that you take today will turn up there, but actively living in the past is a no go.
the future is even further
likewise, there is nothing that has happened in your future.
it’s not here yet.
we can talk about the future happening, but nothing is there. it’s a blank slate.
when we say something will happen in the future, we are making a huge assumption about life.
now’s the time!
the only action that we can take is right now in this present.
in this moment, you are able to do anything that you feel would best benefit your life; you are able to do anything that aligns with living life on your own terms.
you are able to make decisions + take action in this present moment that reflects how you want to proceed in your life, what it is that you truly want to do — your desires, your dreams, + your aspirations.
all of what you feel you should have done, would have done, or could have been doing, you’re able to do right now in this moment.
so you no longer have to worry about the shoulda, coulda, woulda’s.
you can create moments + opportunities for yourself right now.
to do this week:
fuck alla det, respectfully.
today’s action is to fuck the shoulda, coulda, + woulda + focus on what you can do in this moment.
the should of, the could of, the would of are all speculation.
you don’t know. all you’re doing is saying something to pacify yourself in this moment. you’re saying it because you feel it is the right thing to say right now.
it is not.
it is not productive. all it’s doing is inducing anxiety.
focus on what you can do in this moment + capitalize on the opportunities that are in front of you.
think about the following:
- what can I do right now?
- what problem is holding me back + what are some solutions that I can come up with?
- the best use of my time looks like…
- I can use my energy toward…
- since I’m using what I have right now, I’m can do this…
- effort today looks like…
- what do I need to learn in order to better execute this?
over the course of the week, show us how to live life on your own terms by doing just that.
your energy, your focus, your efforts, + your drive all reflect what’s going on right now.
allow the love you have for yourself, others, + life in general to guide you into making a meaningful impact today.
additionally, keep reciting those affirmations!
for 21 days straight we are reciting previously written affirmations.
continue reciting your affirmations this week.
check out the previous episode if you have not to get a jumpstart on this action step.
affirmation cards are here!
dear dope chick™ has affirmation + encouragement cards readily available on deardopechick.com. head on over + purchase a deck to have those cards on deck while you journey!
cop a deck of encouragement + affirmation cards
these pocket sized affirmation cards are perfect for every day + on-the-go encouragement! shop our decks here.
my final thoughts:
take action today + watch your life change.
it may be subtle, it may not look like much right now, but change is change no matter how you slice it.
use what you have right now to get what you want.
don’t worry about what should have, could have, or would have happened — it’s not real.
your mind is playing tricks on you. when you start thinking like that, think about your mind playing tricks on you.
none of us know what would, could, or should have happened in life. we could have all of the same information we have now + still not have the same outcome.
life is about possibility + opportunity.
anything is possible given you take the opportunity, take action to live the life you most desire.
life on your own terms, consciously + intentionally, starts today; it starts right now.
get into your life, sis!
you deserve the effort, your effort, to steer your life in the direction of your desires.
what you think will happen is all in your mind, but what truly happens today is in what you do.
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i appreciate you taking the time to read + listen!
thank you for taking the time today to learn + to put into action what you’ve learned today.
thank you for showing up today + most importantly, thank you for being you.
i’ll see you on the next episode. 👋🏾
be you, be dope!
Phylicia Sadsarin
Mindset Coach
cop dope merch: deardopechick.com